They ask…

WHAT IS WRONG WITH BEING WHO YOU WERE ?

I want to be better.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH WHO YOU ARE NOW ?

I don’t know who I am now.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH WHO YOU WANT TO BE ?

you ! ūüė¶

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I just got LITT UP !

You wouldn’t guess what is about to happen !!

I wasn’t able to myself.

I mean they just said goodbye to me what feels like a week ago,

but they are back !

WITH AN EFFING BANG…

Fun times are ahead people !

Now do you wanna guess?

no ?

But you have to guess…….

Still no ?

ok fine !

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HELLO EXAMS !

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( this is also what my date sheet said to me the other day, I am just spreading the word )

Bllaahhh..

I can’t believe this .

My mid semester just finished and now my semester are waving at me all smug like ‘You should have known this ! “

Well, I should have known better than to put a colored top with the whites, but I still did it, didn’t I ??

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Ughh, can’t you see ??

MY EXAMS ARE STALKING ME !
I need to get a restraining order stat !

Also , I need to study …..

oh well later, let me vent some more first !

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OK

   Done !

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live and let live

(exams I am looking right at you )

Love everybody !

   See ya when I see ya !

ENVIOUS ANYBODY ??

There are SO many thing in this world that I want to do, most of them bordering idiotic but I want to do them anyway.

In fact there are so many things in my bucket list that they can’t even fit into a bucket.

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I know !

But sometimes and under some conditions, circumstances and situations we are not able to accomplish those dreams.

Obviously then we are sad

but to put a cherry on the top of the cake

somehow and from somewhere ( for eg. from our personal hell a.k.a. facebook  )

a bomb drops quoting in a calligraphic handwriting that so and so person is now doing so and so thing

that YOU already reserved the right to do !

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then comes the phases…….

PHASE 1 : SHOCK AND HEART WRENCHING SADNESS

You feel betrayed, shocked and sad.

It is a betrayal like no other ,

even if the person didn’t know that you wanted to do or be that thing

from the bottom of your heart !

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PHASE 2 : JEALOUSY

You feel extremely jealous

because it was you who had dreams about accomplishing that thing

and somebody else just comes in hacks your dreams

and go their merry effing way.

Oh hell no !

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And then you start hating that person for a little time

like a second or maybe 2 minutes,

depends on how close you are to that person.

PHASE 3 :ENVIOUS MODE

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Now because your heart is not in agreement with your brain

and since brain is scared that the heart will stop sending blood to him

( seriously heart is an epic physical and emotional blackmailer )

you start obsessing over the fact that somebody else is accomplishing things in your place.

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You start portraying yourself as that person and imagine all of the things that would have happened

if you were in his or her place !

PHASE 4: ACCEPTANCE

Finally you are able to adapt to the fact that somebody else gets to live your dreams

and you are thus no longer jealous of that person

but still envious and ready to move on.

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PHASE 5 : MOVING ON

Now you have moved on

and don’t even remember this thing happened because frankly

ain’t anybody got time for that !

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And after a long long time you are normal again and have stopped PMS-ing !

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hallelujah !

AND THEN

something else happens that triggers the above mentioned phases all over again

and my dear folks you are screwed all over again .

But

you should always know that its okay ,

in fact its human to go through all of these phases,

you do not need to hate yourself for that

but what you should understand is that you have a life,

others do too but that is only where the similarities end.

Live YOUR life .

do not imagine yourself in others.

envy yourself and thou shall move forward.

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SUB : WHY THE DOOR TO MY ROOM IS NOT OPEN AND CLOSED !!

DEAR OVER AGED YOUNGSTERS ,

Jessica-Lourdes-Pearson

FINE !!

DEAR ‘ADULTS’

I have experienced and observed (because I got nothing better to do)

that parents often argue with their kids on the subject of the door to their room being closed and by closed I mean shut tight

(if you do not fall into this category then you are probably a good parent….or a very very bad one ).

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ANYHOO

For you and only for you I am listing down the reasons for what you consider a sin !

WHY THE DOOR TO MY ROOM¬† IS NOT OPEN…

  • The reason is not because I am doing something secretive.

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  • It is also not because I am mad at you.

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  • It is so not because I want to create a barrier between me and you.

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  • It is not because I don’t like you guys.

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  • It is also not because I am depressed or a loner.

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DISCLAIMER :- In some of the cases the above following point can actually be the reason for the door not opened, in which case my dear adults you are effed !!

WHY IT IS CLOSED…

  • It is only so because I have finally reach the stage that I need to have my own space and need some time introspecting ( OK fine maybe a wee bit of daydreaming is also involved ….)

'Your honor, SHHHHHHHHHHH. Can't you see the defense rests?'

  • Also I need a place to dance where nobody can see me !

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DISCLAIMER :- In some of the cases the above following point is the excuse that you might get for the door being closed, in which case also dear adults you are effed.

MORAL :

Whatever you do, whether you try to open the door or let it remain closed, you are effed….

unless and until (yea, there is still hope for you ) you believe in what you taught us and know we can take care of ourselves !

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THANK YOU FOR READING THIS.

YOURS ALWAYS

TEENAGERS

(even if you don’t like it)

SUPPOSEDLY I am not SUPPOSED to hate the word SUPPOSE !

DO you ever wonder what the world would look like without this particular word in our dictionary ??

Yes, HEAVEN !!

I can not even count how many times I’ve done things because I was suppose to do them.

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yup, like brush my teeth at night !

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OR

how many times I am not even able to recognize my own emotion and differentiate them from what I am

or What I am supposed to be feeling !

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IT IS MIND BOGGLING !

Let me clarify the word suppose for you .

SUPPOSE means be required to do something because of the position one is in or an agreement one has made.

In other words,

It is a term that restricts one to do, think or be anything else other than predefined

because he is a civilized human in a nicest, most gentle way possible. ūüôā

oh yeah, heaven !!

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I agree with the importance of “suppose”

as it supposedly rules our every rule ,

all of which starts with you are not suppose to

or you are suppose to !

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But

just like some rules are meant to be broken,

some “suppose(s)” are meant to be questioned !

(preferably the one’s that have suppose to in there somewhere)

WHAT IS THE EASIEST AND YET THE HARDEST WORD TO SAY IN ENGLISH DICTIONARY ???

SORRY !

I think we all would agree on this.

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While we throw out strings of sorry(s) all day and every day

to a table or a chair (yea I know you do that too)

We rarely sometimes ever are actually able to use this word to a being that can understand it !!

HUMANS.

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We all are psychologically proud beings who all have egos the size of mountains

and a super-hero power of ignorance.

I get it.

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We all are too much of those things to admit that

our actions just had an affair with consequences

and now they are having a messy break-up.

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Thus a simple word like Sorry becomes the bane of our existence.

LITERALLY.

Because why would I want to use it if it can stop the feud between the above two,

give me a sense of closure

and stop guilt (that overzealous product of a zombie )

from eating my heart out.

Also my life will then be not so interesting and more peaceful.

WHY IN THE HADES WOULD I WANT TO ACCOMPLISH SUCH A THING ??

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On a serious note,

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I know its hard but you can do it , you can be a better person !

Unless you murdered somebody in cold blood, then you are just a plain psychopath.

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TIP : here is what I do , I take a deep breath count from 3 to 1 and blurt it all out !!

#ItWorks

ALSO

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WHY I am not able to make decisions..

Let me clarify this for you Decision making for me is like a workout…a 3 hour workout.

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Not because I don’t know what I want but because there are so many parameters to one decision.

their are a lot of things that affects a decision.

LIKE…

  • THE SHARKS A.K.A the society

What if the decision I make affects someone somehow in a bad way.

For example, If I decide not to eat McDonald’s burger for a month ( which is ridiculous because I can not survive without it)

then I am basically working against growing economy. That is the only reason why I just go and eat it.

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#DECISIONS

 

  • THE VULTURES A.K.A THE CRITICS

There is always a person in one’s life who just has to criticize you for a living.

They just wait on the sidelines and bide their time for when you make a bad decision and are on you like vultures in the very next second.

For example, should I do my homework or Blog and I for one always chose blogging and hence leading to me being chewed by the vultures.

Pun Intended !

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#HARD_DECISIONS

  • PHYSIOLOGICAL ENERGY SAVING MODE A.K.A. MY LAZINESS

I can genuinely say I am not lazy just that I forget to do things.SWEAR.

And then I have to lie down and think about them.

I always try to overcome my laziness….for a split second before it hits because then I am just too lazy to get rid of it.

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#WHAT_DECISIONS?

 

  • VODKA AND TEQUILA A.K.A. THE INFLUENCES

We all have our role models and people we trust.

They have such a strong hold on us that we let them have the veto power in our decision making.

For example. Should I complete the blog now or watch Harry Potter and complete it later ??

(Obviously you know the answer….I then had to have a HARRY POTTER movie marathon )

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#PRIORITY_DECISIONS

  • THE DEVIL’S SIN A.K.A. THE PRIDE

OK ! so all of us have been through this.

We all have our self worth and we all are proud and even maybe a little egoistic

and some decision just don’t it for these traits of ours.

For example, should I admit to this mistake or just keep on fighting. And most of us don’t because we have our prides.

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#PROUD_DECISIONS

YES, decision making is hard today if you give an eff about what other think about you or what is right.

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And many of us don’t have this attitude and suffer because there are so many parameters to cover

like whether what I am doing is right or wrong, I have pride,¬† whether it is supposed to be ethically and morally correct…

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There are so many aspects but what I recommend is

you do what you feel is right because at least at last you won’t have anyone else to blame for it or take credit for it because they are your decisions.

Only thing you need to know before making a decision is its consequences and whether or if you’ll be able to face those.

    Let other people help you but do not let them have the right to veto over you.